Altogether Falling Apart

I went for drinks after work with a friend and his girlfriend tonight. We were sitting outside on the sidewalk and suddenly everyone gasped and turned. I turned too and saw a panicked cat zig-zagging across the street in heavy traffic. The cat had already been hit by the time I saw it, but managed to get to the other side of the road. There was a girl next to me who kept her head in her hands for at least five minutes muttering things like, "Omigod. The night is ruined. I can't eat." The guy across from her looked at another guy at their table and said, "Happy birthday, dude." The "Dude" said something like, "Ohmigod." He sounded like Fred Schneider from the B-52s. It took ten minutes, but they were eating again, even after the couple I was with returned from across the street and reported that the cat was dead. I asked, "Are you sure?" And my friend from work nodded his head, quite sure, and replied, "Oh yeah." I suddenly realized that the prosciutto I was eating tasted like wet dog. I covered it with a napkin and we all told stories about pets that died when we were kids.